


Torchwood: Lockdown

by raven_jones



Category: Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Torchwood
Genre: Canon LGBTQ Character, Canon LGBTQ Male Character, Chaos, Character Death, Comedy, Drunkenness, F/M, LGBTQ Character, LGBTQ Themes, M/M, Post-Episode: s02e13 Exit Wounds, Pre-Series 03: Children of Earth (Torchwood), Regeneration, Regeneration (Doctor Who), janto, lockdown - Freeform, oneshots
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-30
Updated: 2020-12-30
Packaged: 2021-03-10 00:22:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,981
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27714695
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/raven_jones/pseuds/raven_jones
Summary: (Short oneshots/drabbles)Jack, Gwen, Ianto & Rhys are stuck in a 'bubble' together because of lockdown. They have to live and work together for 8 months, confined to the Torchwood Hub - how will they survive?This is a collection of scenarios I imagine they'd get themselves into.
Relationships: Gwen Cooper/Rhys Williams, Jack Harkness/Ianto Jones
Comments: 5
Kudos: 24





	1. Jack Snores

**Author's Note:**

> Hi y'all! I disappeared for a while - mental health was not my friend haha - but I'm back!  
> Not sure if I'm ready to continue the 'Timeless' series just yet, so I thought I'd keep myself occupied by occasionally posting a fun little Torchwood lockdown scenario. I hope you like it :)

**Day 1**

**7.30pm**

"Alright," said Gwen, rounding up the boys. "Listen. If we're going to be a family for 8 months, you lads are going to have to cooperate. And that means you too, Harkness," she sighed. Jack snorted.

" _I'm_ perfectly fine - it's your boyfriend you should be worried about."

Rhys cut in defensively. "Oh aye, mate, 'cos I'm the one that almost got her killed-"

"Oh Lord, give me strength," Gwen muttered to herself, giving Ianto a look. He shrugged apologetically.

"I'll try and tame him for you, but I can't promise anything. Coffee?"

"Please."

They walked over to the coffee machine together, leaving Rhys and Jack trying to assert their dominance.

"How long d'you reckon we'll last, Ianto? I'm calling 2 weeks before Rhys throws a tantrum and takes a sleeping bag outside to the water tower."

"Ha. I'd like to be a little more optimistic, but you're probably about right. Sugar?"

"Two, thanks. It's going to be a long night."

**11.50pm**

The door to Jack's office burst open, and Ianto yelped, pulling the covers over his head to shield his eyes from the light - a torch?

Rhys stomped forward and shone the light right in Jack's face.

"For God's sake, man! I can hear you snoring from downstairs - will you _shut it_?"

"Hello, Rhys," mumbled Jack, trying to keep his voice calm and professional. "I'm sorry, but I do _not_ snore."

"You bloody well do!"

Jack turned his body around to consult Ianto.

"Ianto, sweetie, do I snore?"

"Uhh..." Ianto blushed and avoided Jack's eyes. Jack scoffed.

"I do not!"

"A'right, how's this." Rhys took his phone out of his pocket, pressed some buttons and put it on the desk. "When you wake up, stop the recording and you'll hear your bloody snoring! It's enough to take the roof down."

"Hey! You really wanna hear our sex noises?" Jack half-smirked.

"God help me." Rhys slammed the door and went back down to Jack's bunker, where he and Gwen slept.

"How'd he take it?" Asked Gwen.

"Like a prick."

**Day 2**

**8.00am**

When Rhys woke up, Gwen was already up and about.

"Morning, lover," he called to her, but she didn't hear him. She was standing in the corner, shoulders hunched, looking as if she was crying.

"Hey, what's wrong?" Rhys leaped out of bed and walked up behind her, naked. Gwen shrieked.

"Are you..." Rhys hesitated. "Are you crying or laughing?" There were tears rolling down Gwen's cheeks, and she was practically hysterical.

"I - " she tried to speak, but doubled over in laughter instead. After several failed attempts at forming a sentence, she just handed over Rhys's phone, still wheezing. Rhys raised an eyebrow and pressed play.

"Oh, bloody hell!" He quickly tried to find the off button. "I'm not listening to that!"

Wiping her eyes, Gwen squeaked, "Se - seven hours of - oh God! Seven hours of SEX NOISES!" She collapsed back against the wall and held her stomach. "Oh, fuck! I hate them!"


	2. Rhys is Peckish

**Day 3**

**10.00am**

"These are 'Weevil nuts', Torchwood's finest produce - feed Janet a handful every few hours, and no more. Got it?" Jack said impatiently. Rhys nodded.

Handing him the bag, Jack repeated, "Only a handful!" And went back up to the main part of the Hub. Rhys heard a growling coming from the cell furthest from the door, and shivered.

"One handful. One handful," he mumbled as he ripped open the packet. "These must be stuffed with protein. Oh, it says the ingredients." He skimmed the side of the bag and raised his eyebrows. "Sounds tasty, mind you. I'm sure one won't hurt." Rhys looked around him dramatically to make sure no one could see him, and downed a couple of the Weevil nuts.

Gwen laughed from the other side of the security camera. "You absolute numpty."

He was surprised to find that they weren't bad, really. A bit too salty for his liking, but before he could stop himself, he'd downed half the packet.

"Whoops."

**10.30am**

" _Gwwweeeennnn_ ," Rhys groaned, leaning against the door to the greenhouse. Gwen put down her watering can and smiled knowingly.

"Yes, dear?"

"I think I ate something dodgy. My stomach's doing - _owwww_ \- it's doing backflips!"

Shaking her head, Gwen said, "You didn't eat any of the Weevil nuts, did you?"

"The what?" Rhys asked innocently. "Are they - _ugh_ \- are they for the Weevils?" Gwen nodded. "No, I don't think so." He said. "You know what? I'm sure it's nothing, I'll just have a quick lie down..."

**10.35am**

"Okay, okay. I ate the Weevil nuts." Rhys hobbled back into the greenhouse and confessed. "They were good though!"

"You big idiot," laughed Gwen, kissing him on the forehead. "I'll have Ianto check you out in the medical room."

* * *

"These are not fit for human consumption. I can't believe you ate _half_ ," said Ianto as he did a full bioscan on Rhys. "Also, your blood sugar is a bit high. Maybe cut down on the takeaways."

Rhys was in bed for a week. Gwen had to take regular breaks from work to feed him mashed potato - it was the only thing his stomach could handle.

"About Rhys," Ianto said tentatively to Jack. "Did you trust him with the Weevil nuts?"

Jack shrugged nonchalantly. "Maybe."

"You knew he'd eat them, didn't you?"

Jack smirked. "Yeah."

"Bunch of children, honestly. It's like babysitting preschoolers."


	3. Ianto Goes Shopping

**Day 7**

**12.00pm**

Jack, Gwen, Rhys and Ianto were lounging around in the Hub, bored. After one week of no communication with the outside world, they were all starting to go a little cross-eyed.

"I'm hungry," announced Gwen. "I want pizza."

"Someone should probably go shopping," said Jack, and they all instinctively looked at Ianto. Ianto, who was fiddling with some paperwork, looked up.

"Can't one of you do it?"

They shook their heads vigorously.

"On my period," said Gwen.

"Me, too," Rhys agreed quickly. "Wait - no - I meant -"

Jack laughed and playfully punched him in the arm. Rhys winced.

"It's alright, big boy, no one's judging!" Jack stood up and sat on the desk where Ianto was scribbling signatures. "I'll go, if you want. I need some fresh air anyway. Fancy a walk down the Quay?"

Ianto sighed contentedly - the idea of a bit of alone time with Jack was just what he needed right now. He looked up sweetly at Jack and nodded.

**12.20pm**

It was a refreshingly sunny May day, and Ianto gladly took in gulps of the sea air. He'd taken off his jacket and rolled up his shirt sleeves; even Jack had abandoned his beloved coat for the afternoon. Seagulls chirped and the occasional dog walker passed by, but otherwise the place was deserted.

"So," began Jack, "I've been thinking."

"Yeah?"

"Yup. It's been a while since we had, you know, some time alone. A date night, I guess. Maybe we could, I don't know... go out for a meal?"

Ianto blinked. "All the restaurants are shut," he deadpanned.

"No, I know - but," he let go of Ianto's hand to fish his Torchwood ID out of his pocket. "Special ops, remember?" He winked, and Ianto practically melted. "I've got _power_ , is what I'm saying. We could have a place all to ourselves!"

"Sounds lovely. Where are you thinking? The pizzeria in the city centre? Ooh, how about that Thai café?" Ianto licked his lips. "That spicy shrimp soup..." There was a distance look in his eyes, and Jack snapped his fingers.

"Hey! You're in love with _me_ remember, not spicy soup! Why do you never do those gooey eyes at me?"

"Get me some shrimp and I might," teased Ianto, leaning in to press his nose against Jack's for the briefest second. As quickly as he'd entered his flirty mood, he was back out of it.

"Also, Gwen needs some pads. Can you get those in a supermarket."

Jack shrugged. "Never really thought about it."

And that's how, half an hour later, Ianto found himself in the middle of a _Sainsbury's_ , frantically trying to find the period section - would it be with the toothbrushes? The loo roll? The shampoo products? The pharmacy???

After stalking through every aisle, he eventually found a wall full of multi-coloured, multi-branded and multi-sized packets of sanitary towels. Also tampons, and menstrual cups (even Ianto's vivid imagination couldn't help him there), and some reusable period underwear. There was more choice here than in the whole of the coffee and tea section - how was he meant to choose?!

Ianto really wanted to call Gwen, but he couldn't voice his embarrassment, and wanted to be a gentleman. He took his time surveying every single item, shifting his weight from one foot to the other, awkwardly eyeing anyone who came within a 5-metre radius of him. This situation required dire concentration.

Just as he'd started on the bright green section of products on the wall, he was acutely aware of a group of what he can only describe as _lads_ making their way towards him. Panicking, Ianto immediately aborted the mission - he grabbed whatever was closest to him, shoved it between the blueberries and jam in his basket, and backed the fuck outta there.

Jack appeared out of nowhere, holding 2 loaves of bread.

"Hey, you alright?" He asked Ianto.

"You took your bloody time!"

"Uh, yeah, well, I met an old friend. You look spooked, though - what's up?"

Ianto brushed off the comment. "Nothing. Let's go."

**2.00pm**

Gwen scrunched up her nose as she fished through the bags of groceries.

"Ianto?" She called. "Did you get my pads? I can't find 'em!"

"They're in there somewhere!" He called back from the autopsy room.

Gwen, frustrated and slightly hormonal, emptied out all the bags onto the floor.

"There really aren't any pads in here!"

Ianto sighed, put down his scalpel next to the corpse, and came up to the main Hub. He rummaged through the mess on the floor and held up a thin yellow packet triumphantly."

"Uh, Ianto... that's a packet of tissues."

* * *

**6.00pm**

Jack held out his arm to Ianto, who rested a hand on his strong bicep, trying not to squeeze too hard.

"Ready?"

"Yep."

They took the Rift Lift up to the city, and strolled across the Plass, admiring the neon lights in shop windows. Not that the shops were open, but still, it was nice.

When they'd arrived in Canton, having taken a short break to make out by the river, Jack took out a ring of keys and inserted one into the lock of _Thai Touch_ , Ianto's favourite place to eat.

"Do I even want to know how you got that? He half-joked. Jack meaningfully kept his eyes on the lock.

"We have 2 hours, max - then the security will be back online."

"Let me guess, you got Tosh to hack into the system before she died, because you knew the day would eventually come when you'd take me on a date to _Thai Touch_."

"You got me." Jack pushed open the heavy door (Ianto noticed the way his arms strained), and flicked a switch. Lots of electricity-powered lanterns came to life, emitting a romantic soft pink glow above one of the booths.

"Ladies first," said Jack, bowing to let Ianto pass. He followed him into the booth, his fingers brushing his lower back.

Suddenly, Ianto stopped walking and jerked backwards, knocking Jack to the ground and almost landing on top of him.

"Hey - what? What is it? Weevil?" Asked Jack, fumbling around his trousers for his Webley. Ianto didn't even hear him - he just stood up and bolted out of the door as fast as his legs would carry him.

Cautiously, Jack got up on his feet and pointed his gun at the booth. _One... two... three-_

"Surprise!"

Oh, fuck no. Not again.

Jack lowered his Webley, but didn't put it away. "What the hell are _you_ doing here? I thought we agreed!"

"Huh. I thought you missed me." Captain John Hart stood up, bumping his head on a lantern. He tried to play it cool, and reached a hand out to Jack's cheek. "It's been so _long_ , hasn't it? How are you, dear? How are the kids?" He craned his neck to look at the doorway. "Eye-candy not too keen on me?"

Stepping back, Jack growled. "I'm leaving."

"No, wait - you can't just go!" Captain John hesitated. "I - I missed you! Come back!"

But Jack was already out of the door and around the corner, searching for pale skin, blue eyes and a sharp suit.


	4. Everyone Hates Captain John

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a continuation of the previous chapter
> 
> SPOILER WARNING - this chapter contains a spoiler for those who haven't read my work 'Timeless' and its precursor 'Jack and Ianto Travel Through Time'. Something, uh, happens to Ianto which changes him considerably. You can still read this though, it'll just be unexpected :)
> 
> Also, this takes a slightly dark turn towards the end, apologies in advance haha

**Day 8**

**7.00am**

When Gwen woke up, she headed straight to the kitchen for a glass of water. She jumped when she saw Ianto slumped in the corner, a bottle of vodka in his hand.

"Ianto! Put that down - it's morning!"

Ianto shrugged and sniffed, and Gwen realised that he'd been crying.

"Dint sleep anyway," he mumbled. Gwen thought that he and Jack had been on a date last night - she assumed it didn't go too well.

"Did you sleep in the kitchen? What happened? I thought you were out with Jack last night?"

"I was _meant_ to be." Ianto put the bottle down with a thud, and Gwen carefully moved it out of reach. "But _someone_ turned up and ruined it!"

As he said this, the cog doors opened and an alarm blared. Gwen shot up and ran up to see who it was, but stopped short. She flicked the switch on her comms.

"Jack, we have an unwanted guest here. Where are you?"

"Right here!" Came Jack's voice from behind her. "Arms!"

Gwen pulled out her gun and pointed it forwards alongside Jack. Ianto stumbled out of the kitchen, saw Jack, and turned on his heel. Rhys was nowhere to be seen.

"I thought I told you to get lost!" Shouted Jack. "What do you _want_ , dickhead?"

To everyone's annoyance, Captain John giggled.

"You know the rules, Jackie - anyone who's arrived in the UK has to isolate for two weeks. So, you don't really have any choice but to take me in, or I might go around giving people -" He paused, checking the smudged writing on his hand, " _Covid-19._ And we wouldn't want _that_ , would we?" He raised his eyebrows.

"Have you ever followed a rule in your life?" Asked Gwen.

"Sure I have, beautiful."

Gwen turned to Jack. "Make him leave, or I will."

"I... I can't. He's right. We can't just let him go, he's a risk to the public."

"Well if he stays, I'm gonna be more of a fucking risk!" And so Gwen stormed off, leaving Captain Jack and Captain John to size each other up.

John stepped forward, pressing his forehead right into the barrel of Jack's Webley.

"Admit it, you're glad I'm here."

"Why would I be?"

"It's just so much more _fun_ with me around. Remember Gray?"

Jack had to fight to keep control over his emotions. Did he remember Gray? Hell. How could he forget.

"Again, I'm sorry about your pretty little dead things. At least Eye-candy made it, though. Where is he? You know, I'm feeling the sudden urge to snog his beautiful face."

"No way, you ain't going anywhere near him. You already ruined our date, and now he won't talk to me!" Jack cringed as he said this, realising he sounded like he was in middle school. John just smirked.

"Okay," Jack put his gun away. "You can stay, but I don't want to hear a _peep_ out of you. You can live in the cellar for 14 days. And if you're lucky, we might feed you."

**9.00am**

"Ah, Eye-candy. I've been looking for you."

Captain John slid onto the chair beside Ianto, who was unhappily entering data at Toshiko's computer station. He was still a little drunk.

"Fuck off." Ianto deadpanned.

"Ooh, fiesty. I like it."

Ianto slammed his fists down on the keyboard, and growled.

"Why are you here? All you ever do is cause trouble. First you kill Jack, and then almost kill Gwen, and then you come back and kill Jack _again - several times_ \- and then get our friends killed. And then you just rock up and ruin what was supposed to be a perfect evening with my _boyfriend -_ which I've been looking forward to for _weeks_ \- because you ALWAYS have to be the centre of attention!" Ianto took a sharp breath, stood up straight, and marched off. He wasn't dealing with anything of this shit today. No, sir.

John cleared his throat. "Noted."

**12.00pm**

"And who are _you_?" Captain John sidled up to Rhys, who was sitting on the sofa and reading _Moby Dick_. Gwen had bought it for him three birthdays ago, and he figured there was no time like the present.

Rhys didn't even look up. "I've been told not to talk to you."

"Hmph. You're no fun." John automatically reached for a gun, but Jack had so kindly de-frocked him when he arrived.

After a searing silence, John snatched the book out of Rhys's hands.

"Hey! What'd you do that for? Give it 'ere!"

Without so much as a conscious thought, John threw it into the pool of water underneath the water tower. Rhys shook his head in disbelief, and stomped upstairs to find Gwen.

"What? You're _still_ not gonna pay me any attention? What do I have to do to get noticed around here? Kill someone?" Captain John collapsed on his back across the sofa, his limbs splayed out. "God, I hate this place. I need some fun... I need Jack."

**1.00pm**

Jack was confused. He'd locked Captain John in the interrogation room after the book incident, so that was fine, but he couldn't find Ianto anywhere. Was he still that upset about John crashing their date? They could've just gone somewhere else - why did he suddenly take off like that? And why had he been ignoring Jack ever since?

"Hey, Gwen!" Jack jogged up to her and asked in a hushed tone, "Have you seen Ianto today?" Gwen looked nervously at the floor, fidgeting with her hands. When she tilted her head up to look back at Jack, he noticed her eyes were sparkling with tears. It was, strangely, beautiful.

"No, I haven't. I think he wants to be alone right now."

"Why? Was it something I did?"

"The world doesn't revolve around you, you know," Gwen scoffed, and shuffled away. _Weird_.

Ianto did, in fact, want to be alone. He was sitting on a bench by the Quay, watching the sea, and drinking a sugary mocha. He didn't usually take sugar in his coffee, but desperate times called for desperate measures.

Images flashed before Ianto's eyes - not just of Toshiko and Owen, or Lisa and the other casualties at Canary Wharf, but people he had never even seen before who were dying, seemingly, right in front of him. There were women from the 13th century and men from the 51st; children from moons far out of this galaxy. How was this happening? He rubbed his eyes, but it wouldn't stop.

"Are you seeing them?" A low, American voice drifted towards him, and Ianto felt like a warm shawl had been pulled around him. He was, he admitted, disgustingly in love.

Jack dropped down beside him on the bench, and pressed his hand over Ianto's.

"How did you know?" Ianto whispered, his voice breaking on the last word.

"You were acting strange. I guessed you could see them too." Jack paused. "I'm sorry."

"Who are they?" Ianto asked. "Why am I seeing strangers, people I've never known, all crumbling to dust? Falling into eternity?"

"Short answer? It's an immortal thing. Also a Captain John Hart thing - the way you reacted when you saw him, I feel like that too. It's just that I can control it better." Ianto raised an eyebrow. "No, I don't mean like _that_ \- I mean, the deaths. All those deaths, I can see them too, and so can the Doctor, when we're around him. It's... It's all the people he's killed. I'm sorry." Jack nestled Ianto's head against his chest, and Ianto let him. "The thing is... it's a long story, but... basically, when John was imprisoned - in the 51st century - the Empress said that his punishment was that everyone who was near him could see all the lives he'd taken. Except, I couldn't let that happen, so I put a drop of my blood in her _little magic potio_ n -' Ianto snorted '- and now only immortals can see his crimes. Again, I'm sorry."

Ianto wasn't sure that Jack was making much sense, but he couldn't bring himself to care. He just wanted it all to stop (the pandemic more than the hallucinations, to be honest).

When Jack felt the dampness on his shirt, he held Ianto even tighter. A whirlwind rage overtook him - Ianto didn't deserve this. Jack, of course, totally deserved it, and had never questioned it - he was a bad person, after all, and his team had never failed to remind him of that. But this pretty little Welsh boy deserved better.

"Come on," said Jack, standing up and reaching a hand out to Ianto. "Let's fix this." Ianto sniffed and ignored him, and stood up by himself.

**2.00pm**

When Ianto and Jack entered the Hub through the cog doors, they were greeted with a sorry sight - Gwen and Rhys were tied and gagged on the floor, and Captain John Hart was pointing two bazookas straight at the entrance.

"Put those down, before someone gets hurt," warned Jack. But it was futile; just as he finished his sentence, two bullets went flying towards him and Ianto.

* * *

Everything was a haze. Ianto was barely awake, and yet Jack was all over him.

"Ianto? Ianto, can you hear me? Ianto, please..."

A wave of yellow energy - regeneration energy, Ianto realised - was rising from his own, surprisingly undead, body. He tried to sit up, but his head felt leaden, and he fell back onto the ground. Jack scooped him up and held him tight.

"Where's John?" He croaked.

"Hanging from the ceiling by his wrists," whispered Jack, stroking Ianto's hair off of his sweaty forehead. "Are you alright? You, uh, kinda regenerated. Same face though," he added quickly.

Captain John (who was, indeed, hanging from the ceiling by his wrists) let out a shout.

"Woooowwweeeeeee! Time Lord Ianto Jones - that's new!"

"Oi! You coulda killed him!"

Captain John just laughed. "And what? You can do better than _that_ , Ja-"

Ianto's head was still woozy, and Gwen and Rhys had been drugged, so no one properly saw what happened next. But it would haunt them for a long time, and remind them of the merciless nature of Torchwood III.

Jack lay Ianto gently on to the ground, planted a kiss on his forehead, and then stood up. His Webley was still in his back pocket; he reached for it, and pointed it straight up. The ceiling reached almost 200 meters above them, but Jack had had a lot of practice over the years.

"I'm fucking sick of you. I'm so fucking sick of you, and I'm not even going to bother sending you back to the 51st century. You're going to die here, and you're _not_ going to die a hero."

Captain John did not laugh. The last sound he made was a strangled stream, which echoed around the Hub along with the ring of the gunshot, and the sound of the bullet flying out of the exit wound and falling back down into the water tower with a deafening _plop_.

Confused as she was, Gwen watched the hard look on Jack's face. He'd already distanced himself from John; it was only a fading memory, now. She tried to catch his eye, but he ignored her.

"I'm sorry you had to see that," was all he could say.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, I know. I know, and I'm not sorry.
> 
> The rest will be more lighthearted, promise!


End file.
